i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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