Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
