those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
