whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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