if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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