So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Randomize
