Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
