Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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