Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
