did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
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