If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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