There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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