Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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