Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
