Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
