Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
