Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
