She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
