i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
