Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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