dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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