margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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