I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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