PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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