better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
