Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
