I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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