chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
