tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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