3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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