Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
