Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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