That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
