why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
