Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
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