I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
