I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
We had sex on a dog bed..
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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