At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
