For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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