I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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