I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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