How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
two words...techno handjob
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
