whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
What drink are we having for lunch?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
