Only a mothe r could love this liver
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
