every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Actions speak louder than pants.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
