are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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