It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
