Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize