Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Randomize
