i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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