drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
