is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
