question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
